Time for a story part II.

This is going to be the last post for sometime.

After giving it a lot of thought (and motivation from the people who know about this blog) I’m back again.

Time for a small story part II.

For the people who want to get context, this is continuation of an old post. Please find the link for part I below,

https://onelovesongadayforher.wordpress.com/2017/02/05/time-for-a-small-story/

It’s been more than a while now. Things haven’t gotten any easier but I think about you little less now (or I at-least try to). And on some lucky days, I go entire day without thinking about you.

You were my unicorn (not that I ever believed in them before I met you), most unbelievable girl I’ve ever met. Infinitely special and a girl I thought I would never bump into (leave alone date).

And again, not that I regret what happened or I want to all of this again. It’s just that I’m trying to process my thoughts (and process you out).

But more than anything, it’s just that I miss you.

I miss staring into your soul through your eyes (and stare at you, without you noticing me, while you were busy driving the car).

I miss those late night car drives. (both your car and infinite cuddle drives in Uber)

I miss those early morning walks in KBR Park.

I miss going to Subway and the drive-in places late in the night.

I miss going to late night movies and TGIF before we went to watch a movie. (remember that video we recorded for our future kids there? Hahahahaha)

I miss those days of waking up beside you and hugging you from back (because you always sleep on your left side).

I miss your hands wrapped around my right hand and your chin on my shoulder.

I miss hugging you to death until you squeak cutely because that’s how tight our hugs were.

I miss playing with your hair.

I miss your touch and how soothing it always was.

I miss eating the food that you cooked for me with all your love (makes feel how stupid I was to not eat the last time I was at your place, because I never knew that was going to be the last time I’d get to eat it at your place).

I miss not having that go to person around, not having that one person who I used to tell everything. But yes, that’s how breakups work I guess. It’s so strange to think that someone I knew so well, is almost a total stranger to me now.And its a shame that, this stranger was the most important person in my life (and I was hers).

More than anything else, I miss being at peace, because, you were my peace. With you beside me, there was very less that I’d have to worry about.

Again when I look back today. I know you had your reasons for ending this. And they’re all as valid as ever. And I can’t ever say that you didn’t try enough. Because we know you did. Please don’t ever blame yourself for anything (nor am I blaming you for anything).

But back in the start. We didn’t need any reasons to fall in love. We just did.

As much as I want to have it all again, I think its about time I let you go. For all good reasons, mostly.

This isn’t a regret.And I hope that one day I’ll find someone who I won’t have to say goodbye to. But, a part of me, just misses loving someone. And having them love you back. That’s all. I guess what I’m saying is, I hope things are good with you. I hope everything is great.

I hope everything is great. I hope you’ll find a love. That’s all the things ours couldn’t be.

But, just a small part of me hopes that you still remember what it was like before all the reasons.

And that, you miss me too.”

Happy Valentines Day.

🙂

Ae dil hain muskhil (it’s difficult to live without you, O my heart)

I remember that day.

One of the many dates where we went to watch a late night movie. We went to watch this movie called Ae dil hain muskhil, which is a romantic Hindi movie.

The movie is a about a guy who struggles to move on from this girl who he loved ( who co-incidentally is also one of his closest friends, which is exactly the situation I am in too now. Hahahahahaha.).

And when this song started playing in the movie, I heard a lot of sob’s and felt my shirt get wet almost suddenly. And then I looked at her innocent face while I was wiping off tears of her face. And I was trying to cheer her up by saying, baby it’s just a movie.

But she still continued to cry for a while, said look at him baby, he is so sad.

That’s how innocent and caring she was about a fictional character! Imagine how caring she was about me once upon a  time :)? And how could I not fall in love with this cutie?

Time for a small story.

Sorry for not being able to post regularly people. In my defense, I’m still recovering and trying to get things into place. Last 36 days of my life have been the toughest days, I’ve ever faced in a long time.

So today, I’m going to share some words from a short-film intead of a song.

” Hey. I know we haven’t seen each other.

Or even talk to each other in a while.

But I want you to know… That I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately.

And… I want you to know that… I miss you.

Not I regret what happened or I want to see you again.

Just… I miss you. Just… I miss you.

It’s so strange to think that someone I knew so well… Is now a total stranger to me.

That sometimes I go entire days without thinking about you. Maybe a little bit? Most of the time… I let myself forget. Because it’s easier.

But then I find something. A photo… A gift… The stupid love letters we used to give each other… And the full weight of what’s being lost crashes down on me. Part of me wants to see you again. To hold you again. To kiss you again. But all of those feelings become empty thoughts. When I look back now… Remembering that love isn’t always what it seems. It’s just so easy to forget.

But this isn’t regret. We had our reasons for ending it. And they are as valid as ever. But back at the start… We didn’t need any reasons to fall in love. We just did.

The reasons came at the end. And everything since then has been about reasons. And that’s good. Means that one day I’ll find someone who I won’t have to say goodbye to. But,a part of me ,just misses loving someone. And having them love you back. That’s all. I guess what I’m saying is… I hope things are good with you. I hope everything is great. I hope everything is great. I hope you have found a love…

That’s all the things ours couldn’t be.

But… Just a small part of me hopes that you still remember what it was like before all the reasons.

And that.. You miss me… Too.”